Hey, i really need help! i’ve been looking everywhere and reading my bible, i’ve prayed, asked god, and if this doesn’t work i might attempt to ask my youth leader. But i really want to know how far a christian girl should go with a guy? i know we shouldn’t have sex, but where is the limit? Should i let him have my head against his chest, is it right to let him feel my bum? :S HELP! xxx
Dear Help,
You are right, the Bible doesn’t really give us any clear guidelines of what is right and wrong in this area. It says that our body is God’s temple and it also says to flee from temptation. I am so happy you are searching God’s word and praying about this because God will give you a sensitive conscience and you should ask Him for that. While it is not all about feeling, because many things unpleasing to God, “feel” good, if you have any doubts or you are wondering if something is not honoring to Him, then that is probably the Holy Spirit telling you to take caution. Do not go against what God is trying to tell you. If it feels wrong, then it probably is. Don’t try to talk yourself out of it by thinking, “well, a lot of other girls let their boyfriends do it, what is the big deal?” God wants more for you than that, and you should not be ashamed in any way to just say, “hey, you know, I’m not really comfortable with us doing that.” Guys really respect girls who stand up and say no, because most girls don’t and it is a real shame. If he doesn’t respect you drawing a line, then you don’t want to be with him anyway.
I am so proud of you. Keep searching and seeking after God’s heart and what He wants. As you continue to pray for His desires to be your desires, He will show you what he wants. I would really encourage you to draw a line with “BIG” things though before you get into a situation. Write it down. Make a list and draw an actual line on a piece of paper. Will you let him kiss you? Will you french kiss? Will you make out? Will you let him touch you certain places? Decide now so you are ready to say, “Ya know, I decided I really don’t want to do that.” In the heat of the moment is not the time to try to think it through. Failing to prepare is preparing to fail. There are no right answers and many people may disagree with you, but you need to trust God that He is with you in this, He wants the best for you, and you are doing the best you know how to follow what He wants and ultimately bring glory to Him with the choices you make with your body.
Link Here | January 19, 2008,
well i think that if u have sexual thought while u are doing sumthing than thats when u are going to far i had this question on my mind for a while but then i went to far and i when i was going that far i could tell it was wrong because i knew if my christian friend would have sen me doing it they would have been very disappointed. if u and your boy/gurl friend are touching each other. thats to far! although you probably hear people tellin u this all the time i am still gonna say it. . . touching each other will lead to sexual intercourse and u may not believe it but it is true. it lead my relationship there. do NOT let urs get there!
Comment by springmgaskill |
Link Here | July 18, 2008,
What would Jesus do? Would he selflessly give himself? Or would he put a stop to things before they got too hot? Once you reach a certain point, you will not go back and you will feel bad bad bad the next day. Even if you feel good good good right then.
Comment by emmanunn |
Link Here | September 28, 2008,
Look elsewhere on this for my answer regarding this. You should embrace your sexual side but you should protect your virginity. You don’t have to walking around feeling bad guilty or like your going to explode. Look into what is acceptable and you can fulfill him and you whilst retaining your virginity which is a gift for your husband.
Comment by lucy Spencer |